"Come Fly Our Friendly Skies"

(This is really long, sorry...it's more me de-stressing than anything. You don't really need to read it all. I won't be offended if you don't) :)
So after 3 weeks of vacation in Colorado and Utah I finally flew back to DC a couple of weeks ago. It was by far the WORST trip I've ever taken. Everything that could have gone wrong (minus crashing the plane) did.
This was the sequence of events that fateful day (I added that for dramatic effect :), you're welcome):

I had a really bad night because I was really sick coughing and I was on narcotics so I didn't get very much sleep...

I ran out of time getting ready so I didn't get breakfast (my favorite meal of the day), then we took my nephew to a friend's house before Kindergarten and I said goodbye to him.

My Sister-in-law drove me to the airport, but by the time we got there, both of my nieces were fast asleep so I didn't get a chance to even say goodbye to them. Booooo.

Salt Lake International Airport is not exactly a large airport and I usually don't have problems flying through there because it's small enough that checking in and security doesn't take very long (nothing like DC). That shouldn't have been any different this day right? WRONG! I waited a good eh, 45 minutes in line just to check in my baggage because there were families all over the place from Europe with skis and a freakin' ton of bags. Lovely. Good thing I got there early and my flight was already delayed.

Getting through the security line took another probably 20 minutes, the line was all the way out into the hallway. But of course, what should happen when my purse goes through the x-ray? TSA person: "Who's bag is this?" Me: "Mine" TSA person: "We need to run it again" Me: "That's fine" (what did they think I was going to say? No? Yeah right.) They run the purse again. Nada. Me trying to be cooperative: "Do you need to look through it?" TSA Peeps: "Yes." Me: "Go ahead." At this point they proceeded to rip apart my purse piece by piece, which is an ordeal in and of itself. Nada. TSA Peeps (who is obviously new and being coached by someone else next to him): "Can we run this through (the wallet, the purse without the stuff in it, etc.)?" Me (annoyed by this time, but acting very nice and calm and cooperative...and glad my flight is delayed since this is taking forever): "Of course, you do whatever you need to." They finally told me what they thought they saw, a pocketknife. Are you kidding me?! A pocketknife. In my purse. Yeah right. I don't have any clue what they thought they saw that looks like a pocketknife in my purse, but I'll tell you this much, I don't have a pocketknife in my purse. They finally let me go when they didn't find anything. Good grief.

So I get to my gate and my plane is delayed....like a while. So I get something to eat, oh and I get my seating arrangement since I didn't have an assigned seat on my ticket (nice one). But only after standing in another line for a good 30ish minutes. Then....*Ding* "Attention: flight 522 (or whatever it was) to Chicago O' Hare your flight has been delayed" AGAIN. Ok, so that's not exactly what they said, but close. Apparently the President of the United States was in Chicago so NO flights were going into or out of Chicago. I guess he's more important than we are. :) Well, a lot of people were already going to miss their flights out of Chicago and the more we got delayed (since they kept changing the time we were leaving) the more concerned I got about missing my flight.

Salt Lake to Chicago was ok. Then run to find my gate....phew, made my plane. But, I'm absolutely miserable by this time because I'm coughing and I'm on a narcotic and I'm feeling somewhat sick. So we get on the plane and we sit and we sit and we sit. The Captain finally gets on the intercom and proceeds to tell us that for some reason (we switched original planes or something) we have no crew and not only do we have no crew we don't have gasoline. Say what?! That definitely got my attention. I looked at the two men beside me and we were like, that's never a good sign. I was more than nauseous at this point and basically conked out against the window. We sat there forever though. We finally started taxiing and we taxied and taxied and taxied and then STOPPED. What? Why did we stop? Runways are for taking off. Not stopping in the middle of. Needless to say, Chicago is not know for its good weather. There was actually lightning and rain that was visible out the windows of the plane. Back on the intercom, "Sorry folks, no eastbound flights are taking off at this time." They did let us talk on our phones though. I was quite possibly the shade of green by this time and it was roasting on that plane. Their idea of a free movie to show everyone was Jane Austen's Book club or something like that. Uh, no. I didn't watch it. We sat on the tarmac for about 2 hours and 15 minutes. On the runway. We couldn't even re-route because, oops, we don't have enough fuel. At one point I saw the line of planes behind us. It was long. We finally got in the air for one of the bumpiest rides I've ever had (and I was already nauseous). I don't think I've ever come so close to having to use one of those barf bags before. I actually had my head between my knees for a long time. I could describe how sick I was in detail for you, but I won't. Narcotic + Motion sickness (which I get really badly) + bad turbulence + little food (airport food for that matter) + sinus infection + cough = recipe for disaster. It was pretty darn close. I have never been so glad to see the Washington Monument and the Kennedy Center!!

I felt horrible for my roommates, by this point, who were supposed to be picking me up because I knew they both had to get up early the next morning and it was getting later and later and I had a lot of luggage: a huge suitcase, a Massive duffel bag, my laptop bag, and my purse. I had some serious issues carrying all of those at once. Moving on....I made it without puking all over everyone and everything. I'm sure United appreciates that, as do the guys sitting next to me. But, now I have a headache headed toward a migraine. Who wouldn't? So I wait for my bags and duffel bag? Yes. Suitcase? No. They delivered it the next day (I didn't get it on the way there either) Booo....That officially made this the worst trip EVER. I'm NEVER EVER EVER flying through Chicago again. Not if I can avoid it at least. By the time my roommates showed up and I had filled out my missing baggage claim ticket I was nearly in tears. I was dry heaving when I got home and then the trip from HELL was over. The End.

I AM YOUR BROTHER!!!

So I don't usually watch American Idol, but the TV was on the other night and my roommate and I were procrastinating doing homework, so we were watching the auditions. After seeing this though, I have to say it was totally worth it. Hilarious! He even got all 3 judges to sing with him and my favorite is when Paula actually busts a move. Awesome. I probably won't see another episode this season, but it was worth wasting an hour of my night just to get to see this. Enjoy!

New Year's Goals :D

So last week in church a girl was talking about making goals, so my roommate and I decided right then and there to make our own goals for the year. These are the results:
1) Kiss a guy from every state this year
2) Kiss a guy in every state this year (which obviously requires us to visit every state during this year)
3) Eat a pickle a day (too bad she hates pickles. I love dill pickles though, lucky me)
4) Watch a half hour of Hannah Montana a day
5) Waste at least 2 hours a day on the Internet on Facebook, Myspace, GoggleChat, blogging, stalking, etc. (other non-productive things)
6) Break 5 boys hearts this year
7) Make 10 boys cry this year
Hmm....I might be missing some and she's in Florida (maybe she'll kiss some guys, lucky her!!) so I can't get the rest right now, darn. So, do we have any volunteers to help us fulfill our goals? Don't all jump at once!! :)

"Good thing babies are breakable!!!"

OK so I haven't written in a long time I realize. These are the last few experiences from my classes last semester. I know it took me forever to write this even though I started forever ago. Sorry. I hope they're worth it now. :) Enjoy!

So Scatterbrained was on a whole nother (is that a word? eh, oh well, it is now) level one week. This is a direct quote from her while we were studying GI (gastrointestinal): "this is boring. Well it's really not boring, you can save someone's life with this stuff. But, I'm like dying for a guest speaker for GI." Um, did she really just say that her topic was boring? Wow. I guess it was true though, GI is pretty boring but we still have to learn it. I'm not sure a guest speaker would have helped us though. Scratch that...maybe that class would have made more sense from guest speakers. This is a demonstration of what she drew on the board almost daily with her notes. Yeah that's a box that's circled like 10 times with arrows coming off of it pointing to things all over the board. This was a daily occurrence. Too bad you can't read her handwriting. I think my all time favorite moment in that class was when she brought in two old casts from a broken arm and a broken leg and made one of my friends put the cast on to demonstrate something. EWWWWWWWWWW GROSS!!!! Who wants to put on someone else's old, dirty, smelly, nasty cast?! That gives me the willies!! Poor girl. Then Scatterbrained threw her leg up on the front table in our classroom and tried the leg cast on herself. I'm pretty sure I'm was trying to contain my laughter (and horror) on the back row by that time. Yuck!! Seriously. Oh well. She's a really nice lady and was a pretty good professor (minus the ditsy part) and I did fine in her class so whatever, moving on.

My last class period of Drama Queen's class period was rather uneventful, if I remember right, except she just HAD to get in one last jab about milk. Ugh. It started out with her going off on calcium. She told us to ask our patients: "Excuse me?! How much calcium do you take?" Then she told us that we should "take enough to supply our bones, but not too much." This has to do with kidney stones and how too much calcium (aka milk according to her) causes them, supposedly. She said that she "just had to bring it up." Well yes, we wouldn't have it any other way on our last class period than to have you vent one last time about milk. Then she succeeded in throwing in her anti-men clause as well. Kidney stones are incredibly painful (just so you know). But this was her little complaint about men. "Especially men, they act like they are in labor and I say 'No way!' They act like such babies." Hahaha, eh never mind it was funny when she said it. But your public service announcement for the day is that you "need to be really careful about how much milk you drink." Oh no, not again! I'm so freaking sick of hearing about milk. Not that I'm a big milk drinker, but I love cereal, therefore I have milk in my diet. Heaven forbid. However, this is NOT something I ever want to have (forgive the pic, don't worry, they're much grosser in person). But FYI, high calcium alone isn't a risk factor for kidney stones (despite what DQ's opinions may be) other factors are involved. Enough with the nursing stuff. She was also a very nice professor, as dramatic as she could be.

On to the title story of the blog. No, you didn't read that wrong. That is a direct quote from Monotone herself in one of my last class periods. Monotone said, "Good thing babies are breakable." I burst out laughing, I just couldn't contain it, it was too funny. But I was kind of loud and by this time everyone in the class was zoned out already. She looks at me and she's like, "what?!" I'm like "did you hear what you just said? [at which point she stares at me blankly, so I have to repeat it back to her] 'Good thing babies are breakable.'" I was having a hard time keeping a straight face (I think she was surprised to find that I was even listening to her at that point). Monotone then tried to correct herself by saying "one good thing about the babies is that they break easy. [I was still laughing, that sounded just as bad- so she tried to fix it again] Not that they break easy, but that they heal easy. It came out wrong." Well, obviously. I would hope that you're not glad that babies break easily. Too bad she didn't find this situation nearly as humorous as me and my friends did. It was worth it to go to class this day just to hear her say that. I still think it's funny. :D

There's this weird thing about winter here where everyone and everything gets really staticy (that's not a word either). (Yes, I'm going somewhere with this) After the whole breakable babies conversation I had a hard time (harder than usual) concentrating in that class. Both my friend and I were really staticy though and kept shocking each other. So we were discussing this (instead of the lecture- during the lecture)...the following is the disastrous (or funny, whichever way you want to look at it) result of sarcasm + the two of us + Monotone's class + funny moments in Monotone's class + no filter + lack of sleep + too much stress + end of semester= Me: "you just have a sparking personality. You want me to rub you? Oh wait...That sounded wrong...." :) Her: "I dig myself a hole. You jump in it and start covering yourself up." Unfortunately that's very true. Damn.

Moving on to the Postpartum Depression lecture (that was like 15 minutes later in the class)....this was my friend's response about how she's going to be when she has kids. "I'm gonna be like WTF?" [when they hand her the baby and she doesn't know what to do with it]. Me: "Your kids are going to need therapy before they get home [from the hospital]." Her: "I'm not going to lie to you. Maybe that's what their Dad is for." Lovely. Well if we haven't learned anything else this semester I think we have come to the conclusion....are you ready for it?! OK my final conclusion for this last semester is....We're not ready for kids yet. Love them to death, but yeah I'm so NOT ready for them. Nephews and nieces are great. At the end of the day, you get to give them back. I've lived with a nephew and niece and I just spent the Christmas vacation with my nephew and nieces. Yeah, I wouldn't trade them for anything, but boy am I glad I'm still single at this point in my life. There you go folks, that's the final blog for last semester. Sorry it took so long. I hope you're IQ didn't drop reading this. Alright, off to bed so I can start a whole new semester at 8am tomorrow morning. Bleh.

My family puts the "func" in dysfunctional!!!

Not the fun (although sometimes we are that too). Or as my ex-Aunt's twin sister (yes, you read that right) said, "Well sometimes family is the 'f' word." I've decided that every family is a little bit dysfunctional. I'm not always talking immediate families, but if you include extended families then we all have some element of dysfunction in our families. My family (extended) are pros at dysfunction. I love them to death, but at times they drive me crazy. This story is in no way meant to be demeaning or derogatory towards my family or my family name because I'm still a part of this family at the end of the day and I still claim them as my own dysfunctional as they (and I) may be. Yes, I am part of the dysfunction too. :) I love them to death and of course I'd do anything for them which is why I can say we're a bit dysfunctional. Anyways, on with the story...

My beloved Grandmother after 99 wonderful years of life passed away at the end of last year (2007). So less than two months after I visited New Hampshire on vacation this fall, I flew to New Hampshire again, the weekend before finals. But family comes first, so you do what you have to do. My Uncle is a pretty opinionated person (must run in the family), love him to death, but it's always his way or the highway. I'm one of the few people who dare to talk back to him. Anyways, he wanted one of my brothers and I to be pal-bearers at the funeral. I'd never heard of a female being a pal-bearer before but it was ok with me as long as I wasn't the only female doing it. My Grandmother's cousin was one as well (actually I don't really know what she is, I just know she's related, oops). Anyways, I was picking my battles with my Uncle at this point so I accepted his request. However, his next request is NOT one that I was willing to do. He was making the funeral into a freaking huge production. Kind of ridiculous. As much as I love my Grandmother and Uncle it was a little bit out of control. He decided that he wanted all of the pal-bearers to wear matching purple neck ties that match the sweater that my Grandmother was wearing. Uh, pause one minute there please....matching neck ties?! This isn't a wedding and I'm sorry but that's a little morbid. Yes I do know how to tie a tie, I have 3 older brothers. However, I am still a girl I will NOT wear a tie in public (unless it's for a good reason, this did not qualify). When my Uncle told my mother this she was like "Uh, Jennie will NOT wear a tie for you." My Uncle's response, "she won't? Really? Huh....Are you SURE she won't wear a tie." Mom: "Yes, I'm sure. She's a girl. She doesn't wear ties" (those may not be direct quotes, but they're pretty darn close). When my Mom told me this I was like, "uh Mom, I'm not wearing a tie. I may be a tomboy at times, but I'm still a girl." So my Uncle's next proposition was "well, will she wear a purple scarf then?" "Yes, she'll probably wear a scarf." If it'll make my Uncle happy I'll wear the darn scarf. Good grief. A tie. Honestly. The funeral went well and we (me and the other lady pal-bearer) did not end up wearing purple scarves, but the guys all wore the purple ties. I won't go into the rest of the details of the weekend, but it was definitely an experience. Needless to say I did not get a lot of studying done and my finals didn't go so well, but I passed all my classes and I didn't even get any C's so I'm ok with that considering everything that happened this semester. Yes, my family is still very dysfunctional. With everything that happened that weekend, it definitely reaffirmed that, but I still love them unconditionally. It was still worth it to go. A tie. *SNORT* Wow.

A review of 2007

I stole this survey from someone else :)
[X] Became single
[X] got kissed
[X] kissed someone new
[ ] kissed in the snow
[ ] kissed in the rain
[ ] kissed on the beach
[ ] 'fell in love'
[ ] 'fell in love' with a fool
[X] had my heart broken
[X] broke someone else's heart
[X] had a stalker
[X] lost a friend
[X] had a good relationship with someone
[ ] came out of my closet
[ ] got married
[ ] had a divorce
[X] kissed someone of the same sex (on the cheek)
[X] dated someone that you will never forget
[X] did something I regret
[X] lost faith in love
[ ] kissed under mistletoe
[ ] got a promotion
[ ] got a pay raise
[ ] changed jobs
[ ] quit my job
[ ] dated a co-worker
[ ] dated my boss
[ ] dated my boss's son/ daughter
[ ] got fired from my job
[ ] got straight A's
[X] met a teacher who I became friends with
[X] met a teacher who I really hate
[X] found the subject I love
[X] failed a class (since a 78% is now failing for me. Booo)
[X] cut class
[X] skipped school
[ ] got in a fight with a classmate
[X] did something I was proud of
[X] discovered a new talent
[X] proved myself that I'm an idiot
[X] embarrassed myself in front of the class
[ ] fell in love with a teacher
[ ] got the lead/minor lead role in the school play
[ ] made a team
[X] was involved in something that I will never forget
[ ] painted a picture
[ ] wrote a poem
[ ] ran a mile
[X] listened to music I couldn't stand
[X] double dipped
[X] went to a sleepover
[ ] went to camp
[ ] threw a surprise party
[X] laughed till I cried
[X] flirted shamelessly
[ ] visited a foreign country
[X]visited a state
[ ] cooked a disastrous meal
[X] lost something important to me
[X] got a gift I love
[X] realized something new about myself
[ ] went on a diet
[ ] tried to gain weight
[ ] dyed my hair
[ ] came close to losing my life
[X] someone/thing close to me died
[ ] got arrested
[X] read a great book
[X] saw a great movie
[ ] saw a movie so scary that it made me cry
[ ] saw a favorite band live
[X] did something that I wanted to tell everyone
[X] experienced something new
[X] made new friends
[X] found out who your real friends are
[X] lied to your parents
[ ] snuck out
[ ] got in trouble with the po-po
[ ] kissed in a pool
[X] kissed under the stars
[X] had the time of your life
[X] danced
[ ] fell out of love
[X] had a crush on someone
[X] swam in a pool
[ ] made a snowman
[ ] went snowboarding
[ ] went sledding
[X] slept in past 2pm
[X] held someone’s hand that you care about
[ ] got wasted in a public place
[X] told someone you like them as more than a friend
[X] gone on vacation
[X] gone on vacation with a friend
[X] driven a car
[ ] danced in the rain
[X] got in a car accident
[X] seen someone get in a car accident
[ ] got in a fist fight
[X] laughed until you couldn't breathe
[X] missed someone
[ ] sent someone to the hospital
[ ] got a new pet

A YEAR-END SURVEY1.) Who was your best friend at the beginning of this year? The end?
At the beginning- friends from home and Utah, End- Still friends from home and lots of new friends from Va and DC.
2.) What was your status by Valentine's Day? Single.
3.) Were you in school (anytime this year)? Yes, the whole year.
4.) How did you earn your keep? Ha. Doing homework and more homework and more homework and going to clinicals. Did I mention doing homework?!
5.) Did you ever have to go to the hospital? hahahahaha all the time....for clinicals.
6.) Have you encountered the police this year? :)
7.) Where did you go on vacation? Utah, Colorado, NYC, New Hampshire, Maine, Massachusetts
8.) What did you purchase that was over $500? Tuition, books
9.) Did you know anybody who got married? Of course
10.) Did you know anybody who passed away? My Grandma died :(
11.)How many times did you go on facebook/myspace? many many times
12.) Did you move anywhere? To Virginia
13.) What sporting events did you go to? Caps, Nationals (is that it?! Ugh. That sucks)
14.) What concerts did you go to? Harry and the Potters is the only one I can remember. Lamesauce.
15) Are you registered to vote? In Colorado
16.) If so, did you do your patriotic duty on Nov. 6? I didn't get my absentee ballot. I suck.
17.) Where do you live now? Arlington, VA
18.) Describe your birthday. I sent all of my friends and family an email describing what they could and couldn't talk to me about (see in one of my previous blogs) and CRD brought me DP (he is awesome!!). Then my roommies took me to dinner at P.F. Chang's (the only Chinese food I like- not really Chinese, but very good). It was fabulous!!
19.) What's the one thing you thought you would never do but did in 2007? make it through my first year of nursing school (I knew I'd do it, it's just amazing it's done)
20.) What is one thing you regretted this year? Don't really want to rehash bad memories, thank you
21.) What's something you learned about yourself? That I'm a different person on the East Coast than I am at home
22.) Any new additions to your family? Not yet...unless you count the nephew in my sister-in-law's belly
23.) What was your best month? Do people have "best months?"
24.) How would you rate this year with a scale from 1 (crappy) to 10 (amazing)? I dunno. 7 maybe

Narcotics Anonymous

I have been horribly sick for the past week and a half while I have been on vacation in Colorado and Utah. I finally went to the Dr. and he gave me some meds, so here is my disclaimer for the past few days and for the remaining time that I am taking said medication,

To whom it may concern:
I, Jennie, cannot be held responsible for anything I say or do while I am on narcotics. Thank You.
(If you don't believe me, read my appendicitis blog)

Now I am feeling slightly woozy and should go to bed before I pass out or throw up, whichever comes first. Good night.